Cruel Cakes and Cups of Fanfiction

I really don’t have a specific theme for this blog, and I know most places do. However, I like so many things that I can’t manage four to five different blogs relating to all the many hobbies and passions I love doing. One of my passions happen to be writing and creating content, whilst another is playing games and reading books.

I would say I’m a plethora of strange things, as I also love horror and macabre things. So sadly, I cannot dabble placing my many different loves in different areas. Which turns this blog into a cluster fuck of all my strange curiosities and closet of whims.  I am totally in awe at how this blog and many things came to be as of late, due to my impulsive nature to always dive head first into things.

I didn’t really plan out my blog properly, which I had first thought it would be a website solely talking about reviewing books. However, that tilted and I did a review post on a game too… The from the game it went back to books, but then I faltered on doing the review because life got in the way.

But now, I’m back to blogging and rethinking that it isn’t so bad to just write a cesspool of randomness in here. Maybe some of it can be appreciated, most of the time my indecisive writing style will probably annoy people. Anyhow, I forgot to get to the point of why I was writing this blog, I ended up going on a tangent of otherworldly devices.

I wanted to talk about the cruel cake of being drawn into a fandom, and then tasting my first cup of fanfiction tea. It was maybe back in 2015 when I was still living in Hawaii, that I had found this mobile game called My Forged Wedding on Mangafox.com. I honestly thought the guy on the cover was cute, and had figured it was probably like a manga with the way it was drawn.

Lordt, if I had known that this was going to be my crash course into Otome Games and Visual Novels, I would of NOT bitten into the Cruel Cake of Fandom so quickly just because the guy looked cute. Here are the two images that lured my dumb ass into Otome Hell, and forever recruited me into the #OtomeArmada.

Obviously, this guy is what they call a Tsundere (is a female/male character who is usually cold, but he/she becomes spoony on her/his lover. Or, he/she is cold to the main character at first, but he/she becomes lovestruck later), it was after this dude’s route that I totally fell in love with the Otome Gaming Genre. Making me eager to find or hunt down any games of the same vein.

However, back in 2015 there wasn’t a lot of these games, and I struggled with the releases of routes for the mobile apps that I ended up finding the Voltage Otome Fandom on Tumblr. Which was already on fire with passionate people from different POVs and husbandos, however, we were a small group and had a love for these games all the same.

But just like everyone in the fandom, we struggled to find a way to cope while we awaited for a route or new game to come to us. So we spent our time looking for fanfiction, and oh boy did my world get thrown for a loop when I read these either fluff or smut filled stories. It satiated some of my eagerness, but then, it also sparked something that I had long ago crushed to silence.

Ya see, I loved writing since I was a kid, I even RP’ed… But my dreams of even becoming a writer or going to school for an Creative Writing and English degree was crushed very early. Don’t get me wrong, I understand why my parents did what they did, they were hesitant for me to go to school for something other than nursing. Nursing had stability, but what they didn’t realize was that nursing broke my stability of mind and peace.

I’m rambling off point again, sorry….

During my time in the Voltage Fandom, I had started to RP and it gained a certain popularity to a point that one of my favorite fanfiction writers encouraged me to write a story. I was pretty hesitant, because I felt I had no skill since I had stopped writing after high school, but with much anxiety and mixed courage; I found my way to publishing a few fanfiction pieces.

It was after a few of those pieces that I started to get into a momentum of writing and began to feel alive again. When I was done being a nurse in the day, I came straight back to my computer in the afternoon and would just write and write. It was fanfiction at the time, but … one day, a few followers stated I should write a book, or I had incredible skills to be an author.

I remember just thinking that they were insane, because writing is hard… To even try and be a writer in this day and age was preposterous due to the amount of luck and preservation it took to even be noticed. But one person… I will keep their name private since I still talk to them to this day said something that made me realize, it was time to do things my way and screw it with being a complete realist all the time.

“Everyone starts somewhere, whether it’s luck or hard work, you start somewhere.”

While that sounds bland to others, it made complete sense at that time and pushed me to pursue my schooling for a degree in writing. So fanfiction writing… I salute you for bringing me much pain and suffering in pursuing my degree to what I am truly passionate for. The Cruel Cakes of My Forged Wedding to the horrifying kinetic novel of Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni, these games drive my writing and my hope to keep marching.

I keep marching on.